Could Have Been Worse

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These data, from Morning Consult earlier today, show, surprisingly, that Bloomberg lost only three points of popularity, is in solid third place, and is still well ahead of Warren, Buttigieg, and Klobuchar.

Someone named Ben Mathis-Lilley writes, waggishly, “The other good news [for Bloombereg] is that, insofar as humans can only perceive time as something that moves in one direction, he’ll never have to experience those two hours onstage ever again!”

Actually, I Have Yet More Good News

Reports from Mount Sinai Hospital, where Bloomberg underwent an emergency personality transplant earlier today, say that he is out of the recovery room, sitting up, and taking nourishment.

Physicians also took the opportunity to restore parts of his body which Elizabeth Warren had removed.

Meanwhile, it is widely reported that, on Thursday evening, Elizabeth Warren served a delcious evening meal of Rocky Mountain oysters.

Rocky Mountain oysters


On the White House Menu this Evening: Rocky Mountain Oysters


Some Republican Senators are now saying that Trump is a mentally unstable, dangerous demagogue.

If these claims are damnable lies, then your duty as a Republican senator would be to call them out as damnable lies, demand their immediate retraction, and call on those who make such claims immediately to slink out of Washington like the disgraced lying liars they are.

If, on the other hand, the assertion that Trump is a mentally unstable, dangerous demagogue is true, then your duty as a Republican senator is to take drastic action, immediately if not sooner.

If you do not immediately denounce Corker and Flake as damnable liars, then you are conceding that their claims are true.

If you concede that the Corker/Flake critique is valid but choose to do nothing about it, then you are letting Trump castrate you.

Trump is castrating you.

This evening’s White House menu features Rocky Mountain oysters.

Next year Trump and his rabid followers will eat the rest of you.