Could Have Been Worse

Screen Shot 2020-02-21 at 9.31.20 PM

These data, from Morning Consult earlier today, show, surprisingly, that Bloomberg lost only three points of popularity, is in solid third place, and is still well ahead of Warren, Buttigieg, and Klobuchar.

Someone named Ben Mathis-Lilley writes, waggishly, “The other good news [for Bloombereg] is that, insofar as humans can only perceive time as something that moves in one direction, he’ll never have to experience those two hours onstage ever again!”

Actually, I Have Yet More Good News

Reports from Mount Sinai Hospital, where Bloomberg underwent an emergency personality transplant earlier today, say that he is out of the recovery room, sitting up, and taking nourishment.

Physicians also took the opportunity to restore parts of his body which Elizabeth Warren had removed.

Meanwhile, it is widely reported that, on Thursday evening, Elizabeth Warren served a delcious evening meal of Rocky Mountain oysters.

Rocky Mountain oysters

 

The Night of the Long Knives

long knives

An essential feature of a viable Bloomberg candidacy is the confident anticipation that he can stand next to Trump and out-macho the Orange Man. Not the only essential feature—but a necessary one. A sine qua non.

If Bloomberg can’t stand on the stage and look more macho than Elizabeth Warren, there is no hope for Bloomberg.

There will be—can you believe it?—another debate this coming Tuesday evening. For his sake, I certainly hope Bloomberg is hiring some really qualified coaches, paying them whatever exorbitant fees that want to charge, and listening to their good advice.

Also, at this point, I think he has got to release the ladies from the non-disclosure agreements.

It’s going to be a knife fight, and he needs to have his machete ready.

What Bloomberg Should Have Said About the Non-Disclosure Agreements

harassment

This morning, a zillion pundits are telling us how badly Bloomberg performed last night. They are right, of course.

Folks who know about high stakes business litigation have seen this movie before. Marvin Moneybags hires several people, at a combined cost of several thousand dollars an hour, to help him prepare for his testimony. They give good advice.

Marvin Moneybags does not take their advice because he is Marvin Moneybags, and he has some serious blind spots. Because of Marvin’s blind spots, some things that make perfect sense to Marvin Moneybags don’t make any sense to anyone else.

I have seen this movie. In fact, I have been in this movie. Marvin Moneybags testifies, ignoring the expensive advice he received, and he makes himself look like a jerk.

Such was Bloomberg’s contention that the women who signed the non-disclosure agreements wanted them to continue, and he would respect their wishes. He said that several times. It sounded worse and worse, every time he said it.

What He Should Have Said

Some talking heads this morning said he had no good answer, so he should have “pivoted” to some other women-related issue.

I think that is wrong. What he should have said, I think, is this:

“Back in the 1990’s I said some things I should not have said. Some people sued me. I settled the cases by paying money in exchange for their dropping the lawsuits and signing non-disclosure agreements.

“And will I now waive my legal rights under these NDSs? No, I will not do that, and let me tell you why I won’t do it. Because, if I did that, then we would spend the next weeks and months debating about exactly what I said to some folks back in the 1990s—instead of focusing on how to defeat a criminal who wants to overthrow the republic, put his enemies in jail, and let the world burn to a crisp.

“Can we just have a little perspective here, please?”

One More Pre-Game Read

aleajactaest

Most of the anti-Mike pieces I see are from the left. Here’s one from a former Jeb Bush employee: Tim Miller, The Skeptic’s Case Against Bloomberg: Just a few questions before we anoint Mayor Mike as the moderate savior. Hilarious. Informed. Trenchant. I’m not going to reproduce the high points. There are too many of them. Just read it for yourself.

On the stage we will see one Bernie, one Bernie Lite, and four Not Bernies. If the people who like any of the three Not Bernies will just get behind one candidate, that candidate will win the Democratic nomination. If not, then Bernie will win the nomination, and the alea will bloody well have been iacta.

But before that happens, Mike has one chance, tonight, to show that he’s an actual human being, not the robot he has been made out to be. Sort of like those windows that pop up in your browser, asking you to prove you’re not a robot by picking out which of the nine fuzzy, fuzzy pictures show a bus or a part of a bus.

And so, tonight, may the race be to the swift.

Two African American Perspectives

Charles M. Blow, Democrats, Don’t Wish for Your Own Rogue: Bloomberg’s record and misleading statements make him a dangerous choice:

I’m already disgusted by Trump’s lies. Voters are tired of being lied to. Black voters in particular are tired of being lied to. Bloomberg knows that he is twisting the truth [about his stop-and-frisk record]. He just hopes you won’t notice.

I don’t trust Bloomberg. When he had political power, he used it to harm. I don’t ever want to see him with political power again, “ramming through” social programs that harm vulnerable people.

He has done some admirable work as a private citizen. A private citizen is what he should remain.

Jonathan Capehart, Aunt Gloria is still with Biden. But Mom is leaning to Bloomberg:

Like Aunt Gloria, my mother also believes it’s going to take an old white man to beat an old white man. She was behind Biden, but she told me that she is seriously considering voting for Bloomberg during the Acela corridor primary on April 28. And, no, my mom is not bothered by his use of stop-and-frisk or recently revealed controversial remarks about the practice. She just wants Trump out.

“There isn’t a candidate that doesn’t have an issue with the black community. A Bloomberg presidency is better for people of color than to leave Trump in office,” my mother said via text. “I am not concerned with what Bloomberg did or said in the past. I’m looking toward the future.”

Do I Like Mike?

Ike

I still don’t know whether I like Mike. Maybe, come bedtime Wednesday, I’ll have a better idea.

But, folks, get a grip. There’s a big difference between content free political advertising:

and substantive advertising:

If I vote for Mike in the primary, it will not be because he bought my vote, it will be because he has persuaded me that he is the person to take on Trump.

The more you say “Bloomberg is buying the election,” the more you insult me.